Monday, May 01, 2006

OPEN-MIC KINK...

Just performed at Saad's Open Mic night. Been a while since the last one and the turn out was a little less than it normally is. Same excellent mix of musicians and comedians though. Tonight all 4 of Karachi's stand-up comedians performed (or as David calls us: The All-Pakistan Stand-up Comedians Organization). Saad, David, Danish and Me. Everyone did all new material, and we somehow all ended up doing completely experimentational material. It was a blast for us, even if the audience didn't laugh as much as usual. It was really heartening to see that none of us is relying on tried-and-true material and even trying to mix it up in terms of form and style. Felt proud to be part of such a talented group.

Here's one of the bits I did. It's very different from my usual material, in alot of regards. Had fun seeing people react to it though:

The Last Kink

The weird thing about on-line porn is that there is no fetish left untouched. It doesn’t matter what you might be looking for. Every person has the one kinky fetish that they will never tell anyone. Something so deep and dark and disturbing that just thinking about it makes you feel like a criminal. And what’s bizarre is that it doesn’t matter what it is…anything…there is a website for it. And that’s not good. Because one day we will just run out of kinks. There will be nothing too taboo, nothing too kinky that hasn’t been filmed and put on the web for download and the world will just run out of kinky material.

The last film ever made will involve an obese midget and a gay quadriplegic puppy that’s wearing a latex suit. And is dead.


And then no more kinky porn. Nothing. It’ll be over.

And we will have to look somewhere else for our kinky material. And
since everything that was kinky is now boring, everything that was boring will be kinky. Instead there will be websites dedicated to hand-holding, and cuddling and caressing hair. And to access them you have to click the button that asks if you are 18 and above or not. Which is such a great deterrent I feel. And in our private sex-lives we will all be kinky freaks because that stuff will now be the boring everyday sex that we have. And then afterwards, when your holding your lover, and you are sharing that deep personal moment, and they ask you what is the kinkiest thing you ever want to do, and because you feel closer to each other than ever before because of the last half-hour spent in rubber diving masks with spank-paddles and whips. And the obese midget. Because of the moment of vulnerability created by the criss-cross whip-marks across your bum, you decide to reveal your most intimate kinky desire. And you nervously look them in the eye, consciously run your hands through your hair, cheeks turning red with embarrassment. And you say:
“Cuddling.”
To which she responds:
“Pervert.”

And after that the relationship ends.

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